Passed

So, I passed my recital hearing. The joke is that now I get to stop practicing, but in reality it seems like nothing has actually changed. I still have to worry about trying to get people to dress rehearsals, makign sure everything is still memorized, coordinating dates, email-ing people...It never seems to end. I will be really happy when March 22nd at around 4 p.m. rolls around. It will actually be a bittersweet sort of thing because I am to the place now where I am actually invested in the music. I used to dread my French set, but now I am starting to connect with the texts and the music in new ways. I love the entire program, and I am excited for people to hear it.

We leave for tour in a little over a day now. This is only my second choir tour, but (now that I type this I think I already said this exact same thing) I am mega-pumped. I dwindled my to-do list down as far as I could before we leave so I don't have a bunch of stuff hanging over my head the whole time. Granted, there will be some stuff, but it should be a nice relaxing time. I am a little jealous of the people I hear who are taking trips to the Carolinas or Florida. I miss the warm weather. Hopefully we'll be following it as it moves east.

This semester has really made me start thinking more deeply about worship for a number of reasons; I am in my music ministry class, I got to attend the Calvin Symposium on Worship, I'm still working out what SNW should be like, etc. I am reading a book by one of my recently founded new favorite authors, Marva Dawn. She writes from a pretty reformed/conservative Lutheran background, and it makes it seem like all she writes about worship is in favor of traditionalism, but she is really pushing me to think more deeply about what worship really ought to be. She has helped open my eyes to the ways in which our worship has become neither for God or about God in big and subtle ways. She has challenged me to think of how the good news of Christ should form us in everything we do.

In a way this pushing has caused some discontent in my life. I sat through a Chapel service today and just felt frustrated most of the time because I didn't feel like what was happening was actually worship. There were so many little things that caught my attention enough that they pulled me away from doing what Dawn would say is true worship and "royally wasting" my time in the glory of God. Maybe I was just discontent because the day before there had been an Ash Wednesday service that I was able to connect with on a deep level and I had hoped that the season of Lent might be marked by more such reflective worship experiences. I know that I am not on the Chapel planning committee so I have no right to "complain", but these things are helping me to think more critically about the worship services that I do help plan.

I'll leave you with just something to mull over: One of the resources I have been reading talked about thinking critically about the words we actually say within worship and how they can get in the way. One of their critiques of many services was specifically of the first words used. Do they always have to be "good morning"? What sort of atmosphere would it create if we stopped utilizing colloquial greetings and jumped right into worship by hearing God's revelation to us through scripture? In short, how are the first words of a worship service setting the tone for the rest of the service?

looking ahead

I just typed an entire entry and then it gave me some sort of error, so this is round two:

I have my hearing for my recital on Monday where the professors get to tell me whether I can do my recital or not. Today was the first day I had my entire program memorized (all 17 songs), but all the words don't always come fast enough or in the right order. I'll probably be practicing all weekend. Yay! But it is comforting that this week my voice teacher heard all of my ensemble pieces and she seemed very pleased with the shape we were in, especially a whole month before my recital. I'll let you know how it goes.

In other news, Spring break is just around the corner. This is only my second spring break choir tour, but I'm completely pumped. We're headed to PA, VA, MD, and Washington which may all sound like lame spring break locations, but it's not really about the location. It is about getting to spend and entire week with a great group of people and leading people in worship almost every night. It's a great feeling about midway through the trip when we all have the entire program memorized and we can focus on the music rather than staring at our folders. Plus it's always fun to meet new people at home stays and do a lot of reading on the bus and it has been awhile since I've been to Washington.

Now if I can just make it to Friday it'll all be good.

Awhile

So it's been awhile and there's so much to fill in on, but I think one of the things that keeps me from updating is that I try to cram too much in to each post. So, this will be shorter:

Because we've been having trouble scheduling Sunday Night Worship, we had SNW in the morning this past Sunday. I was worried for a number of reasons including the fact that it seemed like no one was going to be around and my guitar player was busy that morning. I decided somewhat last minute that we were going to try doing a more traditionally liturgical service with all hymns and a brass ensemble accompanying the singing. There were so many new variables to the service that I was super nervous about how it would turn out. Added to this was the fact that all of our potential speakers were busy so I ended up having to speak. I had wanted to speak at some poiny anyway, but I had wanted to not be involved in any other part of the service when I did. I'm afraid that it felt like I was controlling everything, but I felt liek someone had to direct the hymns. I think my message went well. It kind of fizzled out toward the end because I really wanted to go to bed and finished before I felt really good about it.

In other news: Trayless Tuesday has taken over campus. In an effort to use less resources, food service has enacted trayless tuesdays and I think they hope to go completely trayless soon. I can't remember the last time an issue like this has been such a big deal here on campus. During the first Tuesday they tried this there was nearly a riot when one girl dropped a glass trying to take her stuff up to the dishroom. People were screaming and shouting "give her back her tray" or " this never would have happened with a tray". I personally think that going trayless helps me find out what is enough food rather than piling it all on, but on the other hand, it is inconvenient to try to carry everything. If nothing else, it is fun to see the campus so moved even if it is by something stupid like this.